I am now 39

This past Friday I turned the last number before the BIG 40. Wow another year older and hopefully a little more wiser. I can not believe this will be my last year in the 30's. I do not feel close to the BIG 40. However, one can not stop time. The morning started off with Nathaniel being his obnoxious self. NO happy birthday to mom, no early morning hugs and intentionally trying to push my emotional button. Yes, that is how my one and only left for school. No call from my husband to pretend like he really cared. His excuse, I did not give him time to call....hmmm. At least I had lunch to look forward to. Lunch with my February birthday friend Lisa and nonbirthday month friend Leslie.

Nate came home from swim practice and tossed my present at me. Yummy dark chocolate!!! He did remember or least take the hints I threw out daily. My awesome sis-in-law delivered an individual chocolate bundt cake (too die for I might add). Steve made it home and off to dinner we went with my parents. We enjoyed Pei Wei and then Braums for dessert. My parents gave me some bath gel and hot rollers (which I have been wanting to try out for sometime now). Saturday, Steve bought me a gorgeous bouquet of flowers and a book that I could not put down while at Costco. No gift bought ahead of time....but one truly from his heart at that moment....and that is good enough for me.

Now I have some reflections of birthdays and age. As many of those close to me know, I am trying my darndest to slow down time. Not because I am afraid to age, but because I dread the day that Nathaniel will graduate and venture out on his own. My life did not turn into the life that I had planned and dreamed of. I did not want to be 40 and be considered an empty nester. The whole term scares me. Being in that bracket and just not quite fitting in anywhere. As for aging, I think I am aging ok. Now as for birthday presents and sentimentals....I am a big kid at heart. I want my husband and son to dote on me. But there is more to me nagging my son about gifts and remembering. I am trying to teach him the importance of these goofy things for his future girlfriends and eventually wife and family. So he can develop these habits now and hopefully keep them long after he is married (and maybe give his dad a few hints). My last rant is that I hope that I have learned something leading up to this day. I hope that I can reflect back and say YES I am a little more wiser.